A relationship that ended. A future forever changed. A childhood you didn't get to have. Sometimes grief has no words—it’s just there, waiting to be met.

Lately it seems like many people I know (including myself!) are navigating grief—that deeply uncomfortable combination of loss and change. Not the wished-for, welcome kind of change but the I wish this hadn’t happened kind.

Grief comes in so many shades, textures and tones. Some of us are grieving the end of a relationship and a future we’ll never have. Others are navigating unexpected news or the loss of abilities.

And sometimes, we’re grieving what I call, the loss of a loss—something we never had to begin with. Maybe it’s a safe, carefree childhood or a flirty fun adolescence. Perhaps, some part of un-lived life got left behind and that just hurts. It hurt then and, maybe, it still does in a wordless way.

Recently, I was chatting with my friend about grief and I shared how I don’t buy into the whole time heals everything cliche. Some losses stay with us. They may soften and change but, at times, they can feel surprisingly fresh and raw. Even years later.

You know how when you look through a kaleidoscope you see bits of colors and shapes? Then you turn the kaleidoscope and some bits get larger, while some get smaller. That’s how I experience feelings in general and especially grief.

Some days, the loss … or the loss of a loss … feels heavier and in front. Other days, it’s lighter and more in the background. But, I don’t expect it to ever go away completely or become “healed.” It’s just that I’ve developed the capacity to carry it without being weighed down by it or wiped out by it.

If this resonates with you, you may be interested in my new guided exercise on how to turn toward grief, so you can honor what you feel without getting swept away in it. By being with grief in this way, you may begin to experience more steadiness and ease. It’s amazing how our bodies can soften and relax when the truth of our experience is recognized, allowed, and respected.

Watch the guided somatic exercise

If you’d like to continue exploring how to be with uncomfortable feelings like grief, anxiety, anger, overwhelm, and more, you may be interested in my upcoming 6-week online course, Coming Back to You. You’ll learn a gentle, somatic approach to being with your experience in a new way, so you can feel more steadiness, clarity and ease—without any pushing, forcing or fixing. Click the button to learn more and how to register.

The last day to register is Sunday, July 5th.

Here’s to living fully in these hard times,

Lauren

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