I help clients learn to fully trust themselves.
Even when it’s hard. Even when others don’t understand.
Here are some of the shifts clients have experienced …
When someone asks them to do something they don’t want to do or don’t have time to do, they’re able to say, “Unfortunately, I can’t.”
No angst. No over apologizing. Just a kind, clear “No.” They go from people-pleasing to empowered living.
They can make decisions! Instead of feeling caught up in anxiety, confusion or the fog of indecision, they have a process which enables them to make decisions with clarity, confidence and ease.
If option A doesn’t feel right and neither does option B, then they trust that inner knowing — Neither option is right.
They have developed the capacity and ability to sit with that uncomfortable feeling of not-quite-right until they arrive at what would feel right.
When asked what they’d like to do or where they’d like to go, they voice what’s true for them… even if their answer disappoints that other person.
They’re able to stay true to themselves AND allow that other person to have their feelings. No more going along, to get along.
Compromising? Sure. Silencing one’s self? No.
They no longer feel tripped up by invalidating comments like “that’s ridiculous” or “you’re too sensitive.” Of course, those comments may still sting, but they can tend to that pain without collapsing into it.
Just because someone perceives their actions as “bad” or “wrong” doesn’t mean they experience themselves as bad or wrong.
There’s a growing attitude of ‘that’s your perception of me, not the truth about me’.
When a doctor or practitioner offers advice, they check in with themselves to see if that recommendation fits and feels right.
And, if that recommendation feels off, they’ll voice their concerns or ask more questions.
Even if they can’t quite articulate what specifically feels off, clients will value their initial hesitation and not push past it. They know something is missing and something more is needed before making a decision.
Over the years, I’ve discovered this amazing truth and that is —
What’s in the way, guides the way.
Ironically, the patterns and habits we perceive as "bad," "wrong" or “in the way” are often healthy responses to an unhealthy environment and/or a traumatic experience(s). They're here for a good reason! Let me give an example …
For many of us, we may have grown up in environments where being ourselves and speaking honestly came with painful consequences.
As a result, we learned to not be ourselves … to dim ourselves down and hush our wants because life was “better” if we did.
So, no wonder it’s hard to trust yourself and value your feelings! Doing so once (or often!) got you into trouble.
It’s disorienting when what feels right is risky and “wrong.”
And, even if you know what feels right, it may be the anticipation of people’s reactions — their disappointment, criticism or judgment that blocks you from acting.
That inner struggle of I-want-to-but-I-can’t is not a sign there’s something wrong with you. It’s a reflection of just how much a particular strategy was needed.
For example, pleasing and appeasing may have helped you …
Keep the peace
Stay safe
Receive affection.
So, this pattern isn’t bad or wrong. Uncomfortable? Totally. Frustrating? Absolutely.
I can help you learn a process, so these patterns shift in a gentle way— without any kind of pushing, forcing or fixing. As a result, you’ll begin to live more fully and be more authentically YOU.
If you want to trust yourself, then you need to learn how to listen to your feelings in a warm, welcoming and unhurried way.
As that ability increases, you’ll naturally begin to feel more steadiness, clarity and ease.
People’s reactions won’t influence your actions. What you choose to do (or not do) will come from within YOU.
No second-guessing. No pushing yourself forward.
Just you being comfortably and unapologetically YOU.
If you want to feel more confident, then you need to learn how to be with inner critics, so they don’t “should” you into doing something you later regret.
And, if you want to do more of what lights you up, then you need to develop an unshakeable resilience, so you can stay true to yourself no matter what.
Curious to learn more about how you can go from where you are … to where you want to be?
Click below to learn more about individual sessions.
Or if you’d like to chat about how I can support you, then click here to schedule a free, no-obligation call.
